todays ghosts

I work half days and come home to my house mate's dog Otis. A beer goes a long way in my world. The internet takes my time and puts it in the woodchipper like fargo. Ever wonder why alaska doesnt have a football team? I don't. So why do people wonder why I'm so weird? I don't. I become the butt of everyones joke in social circles so I don't really wonder why women look at me with disdain, or pity. I just wish more of them looked at me with intrigue and carelessness so I could tell they were eyeing me. I drink more than I should to get together with my room mates and be sociable. I guess I should stop. Im going to see a counsellor again to make sense of somethings. I hope I can make sense of at least one fuzzy aspect in my life. I want a girl or friend to just chill with. coffee, chai teas, cartoons or movies...whatever. lets go for a bike ride maybe, or walk the dog. Im not sure what I need but whatever it is, I need it.